Harlow's Last Minute Letter to Santa and the Untold Story of Mazzy Finding Out The Truth

Nobody talks about how COMPLEX the Santa thing gets as the kids get older. It’s like CIA level subterfuge. As a Jewish person who did not celebrate Christmas growing up, I did not realize what was coming when I innocently started putting presents under a tree back in 2014. We’ve got one non-believer (scroll down for the Untold Story of how Mazzy figured it out) and one FULLY INVESTED cares more than ever, gonna stay up all night to catch him in the act, writes a letter the night before Christmas believer.

Neither Mazzy or Harlow told me anything specific they wanted for Christmas. They didn’t make wish lists and we didn’t visit Santa this year, which is usually when they feel the pressure to think of something. That means Santa *wink wink* had to make some educated guesses about what they would like.

Then, TODAY, Harlow told me she wanted to write Santa a letter. I told her it was too late. She said she wanted to write it anyway. I said, I don’t think it will make it to the North Pole in time. Plus, I think Santa has probably made and packed all the presents already. She sulked off to her room.

A few minutes later she emerged with this:

I think many of you know that Harlow has struggled with reading and writing and this letter is honestly the most I have ever seen her write without asking for my help. I was kinda floored by that aspect alone. It’s also probably the saddest Santa letter ever, except that I bet most of your kids wrote something similar. There’s probably a postman on Elf Lane sobbing as he reads through all of the requests to end COVID. Oh man, the kids are not alright.

BUT! On a positive note, I have some inside information that Santa got Harlow fidgets for Christmas! Phew.

And just so you know exactly where I am at, I just had to use the non-believer to trap the believer in the bathroom so I could run Santa’s wrapping paper (not to be confused with the parent paper) up to my bedroom. Yes, I know a lot of you don’t wrap Santa’s gifts but I did not know to do that all those years ago when I was a Jew giving my kids their first Christmas, and now I’m STUCK. Also. I’m contemplating using a triple dose of melatonin tonight.

Pressure is on, folks. Make the magic!!!!

The Untold Story

Last Christmas Eve, Mazzy went into the garage to get a Bai juice (that’s where we keep them) and when she got back, she told me she needed to speak to me in private. We went into the downstairs bathroom and she shut the door. Then she said, and I quote, “I saw something I wasn’t supposed to.”

Apparently, my sister put her gifts in the garage when she got to house because she didn’t want my kids to see them, not realizing Mazzy goes in the garage pretty regularly. It’s where we keep the drinks and the ice cream. Seeing a bag of gifts would have been explainable, except it was many bags, and my sister had picked up my main Santa gift for Mazzy on her way over, which was the Hogwarts LEGO set. It was unwrapped.

I had a moment of stunned silence as I rapidly wracked my brain for a way out of this. I came up with nothing. The gig was up. Before I could say anything, Mazzy smiled and looked at me with what I can only describe as sympathy. She said it was okay and she was pretty sure Santa wasn’t real anyway. When I still didn’t say anything, she added that she was really excited about the gift and would act surprised tomorrow morning.

Then I sighed, and said okay. We are in this together.

Honestly, I think I was ready for her to know and she approached it with such a good attitude that it felt right. I told her that she gets to be a Santa now, which means keeping the magic alive for everyone else. I also told her that she could stay up to help. She was really excited and immediately started plotting ways to make it even more special for Harlow, Jack and Neve. She was a huge help that night and I got so many knowing glances as we went through the usual traditions— putting out the milk and cookies, reading Twas the Night Before Christmas, looking at the Santa tracker. Mazzy being my helper ended up being a wonderful little twist to our Christmas and I suspect she will be a big help tonight as well.

Now, if Harlow figures it out (last year I mistakenly thought she had fallen asleep and she almost caught me) that will be truly devastating. Fingers crossed we pull it off for one more year!

Are you kids still believers? If not, was there a specific moment they figured it out? How did you handle it? Tell me your stories in the comments!

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