Vacationing with Tween and Teen Daughters is a Whole Different Vibe (+ Lots of Juicy Updates)

Last week we went on a spring break vacation to Mexico (I’m still there on Instagram) so I thought I would interrupt my dyslexia series to give you all a rundown of our trip, plus a bunch of other updates that never made it to social media.

Well, at least not yet.

First, the trip. This was our first warm weather family resort vacation since before Covid. Usually we go skiing in March, but since we went to Vail back in January, I decided our family could use a vacation with a bit more sand and surf, and a bit less lugging of heavy equipment in freezing cold temperatures. We’ve gone to Mexico a few times before, because it always seems like when we research beach resorts, Mexico offers the most luxury for your money. Mike booked the Conrad Tulum, which definitely has less kids club offerings than Iberostar Playa del Carmen, Hyatt Ziva Cancun and Fairmont Mayakoba (all hotels we have taken the kids in the past), but was probably more appropriate for the ages our kids are at now. Plus, I had never been to Tulum and heard great things, so that scene would be new for us.

The hotel was beautiful and on a huge property, so that even though the place was at capacity, it did not feel crowded at all. It was situated on a little cove so the water was very calm and they told us that the mouth of the cove was blocked by a coral reef, so we didn’t have to worry about any big fishies making surprise appearances. Something I ask about ever since my shark experience! The restaurants were excellent (my kids love trying new foods these days), the pool was super luxurious (with a DJ for most of the afternoon), the ocean was the perfect temperature and there was plenty of space to spread out. We had no problems getting a beach bed by the pool or a palapa (that’s one of those little thatched umbrellas with loungers underneath) by the beach. And there were also several more private, quieter pools if you didn’t like swimming with the music and people in the main pool.

My one complaint is that the hotel was a little light on activities. You could sign up for excursions and there was a boathouse on the beach that had kayaks and snorkel gear, but not a very robust schedule of activities on property. The weather was a little windy the first few days, so all the excursions we wanted to do were canceled until the 5th day of our trip, which meant that we did a whole lot of swimming and lounging. I think the kids club had more offerings, but the kids thought they were too old for it. There was also a teen club, but Mazzy didn’t want to go because it looked like it was mainly a hang out room with foozball and video games. In the evenings, they had live music in the bar area by the pool every night, but it felt like they could have switched it up a bit for some variety that might appeal more to kids….but honestly, I love lounging around with my family, so it all worked out great. Felt like a whole week of really relaxed, unscheduled, quality family time.

A few things I want to say about traveling with big kids, so if your kids are smaller, you will know what you have to look forward to in the future.

1. They are perfectly content on a plane and do not bother you at all. We didn’t even sit together on the way there.

2. You can leave them in the room to sleep in while you get up early to do yoga, get coffee, have a morning beach walk, or read by the pool. I did this every morning and it was WONDERFUL. Special bonus, I would also use that time to claim our poolside loungers for the day. Then I would hang out there until the kids got up and met me for breakfast. I didn’t even have to help them get ready!

3. Now that my girls care a little bit more about fashion and how they present themselves, it was so fun to get dressed up with them in the evenings. And a far cry from previous vacations when I would get in fights with them over wearing crocs and cut-offs to nice restaurants. “Are we doing dresses or more casual tonight?” “What’s the vibe of this dinner?” “Which night should I save my fanciest dress for?” All good questions that we got to decide on together. Made me feel like I was vacationing with my girl friends.

4. Harlow vlogged the entire time, which was hilarious. Someone asked where she posts them, but she’s just filming for fun. She does not have access to any social media. She might send them to a few of her friends and she sent them all to me, in case I wanted to use them. But I think it was just her cosplaying an influencer and mainly for her own amusement. Basically, she delivered fake facts about the property and reviews on the rice at different restaurants.

5. Mazzy is on a constant hunt for the sunset. She loves to post them on her social media and ever since our trip to Florida, when she woke up at 5:30am to catch the sunrise, I know to make that a top priority. It’s always been a top priority for me too, so it’s great to finally have a partner in crime. Very helpful in getting the kids dressed and out the door on time for dinner. Or getting her on board for a restaurant by showing her photos of the view. I feel like I’ve been training my whole life to get her the perfect instagrammable vacation shots. And I love that she knows I will take as many as she likes until she is happy. It’s the least I can do for her after all these years! Speaking of Instagram, it was really nice being Mazzy’s sounding board for her posts. She’d show me the pics she was thinking of using (she likes ‘em blurry), talk about carousel order (she never wants to put a pic of herself first), and then bounce her caption ideas off of me. This all makes it sound like she puts way more effort into it than she does. She’s actually super casual about it, but she doesn’t post very often, so it felt important. Or at least nice to feel like this was one area where she trusted my opinion!

6. At some point during the trip, Harlow made a backwards peace sign in a photo and I said, “you know, that’s actually the equivalent of giving the finger in the UK.” From that point on, our whole family was using the backwards peace sign to voice their distaste with anyone or anything that happened on the trip. It would go something like this, “Hey, would anyone like to split the fish tacos with me?” “Nope, I’m already sharing the popcorn shrimp with Daddy so *backwards peace sign.*” Or if I was like, “Everyone looks so nice! Now would be the perfect time to take a family photo!” Mike would be like, “You know what we think about that idea?” And then all three of them would give me the backwards peace sign in unison. Gotta love a good family vacation joke.

7. Speaking of family photos, we decided to do a family photo shoot at the hotel with their photographer and that was probably one of the best decisions I have ever made on vacation. I knew I would not be able to get a full family shot on my own- they always give me one chance to set up my camera with the timer and then one take before they are all over it and moving on- so I didn’t even bother to try. When the hotel photographer approached me about a shoot, that seemed like my best chance. The kids were so cooperative and good about following instructions from a stranger. We all laughed at all the corny photo set-ups which ended up giving us the most genuine smiles. I told the full story on Instagram, so I’ll skip to the end and just say, the photos turned out FANTASTIC. Not only did I get a family shot, I left the hotel with a printed album full of vacation photos. I will do this every vacation from now on.

That’s it for my trip, one of the most fun weeks we’ve had as a family so far.

In other news…

• I went to Sarasota with a bunch of girl friends for my friend Pam’s 50th and now it has me thinking about what the hell I am going to do for mine come this November. Should I plan a trip? If so, is it couples? Just women? Or maybe that’s too complicated and I should just throw a party? It’s a little overwhelming and I feel like I am already way behind the ball. Tell me what you did to celebrate a big birthday in the comments.

• Mazzy and I went to see Olivia Rodrigo on Tuesday night at Madison Square Garden. The concert was great, but I think the best part was seeing Mazzy enjoy herself so much. I had no idea she knew all the words to EVERY SINGLE SONG. Made me feel better about missing Taylor Swift. More on this experience soon!

• Grammy visited a few weeks before our spring break trip and stayed on our couch. The visit was timed so she could schedule a bunch of her NYC doctor appointments at once, so it was during a school week and very low key. I feel like when we usually see Grammy, it’s always for a holiday or to do something very specific. She loves to plan fun activities for the kids— like a trip to the amusement park or the zoo. But that’s getting harder to do as both Grammy and the kids get older. So, in this instance, she was just there when the kids got home from school, had dinner with us in the evenings, watched TV with us at night and there in the mornings, which was honestly, LOVELY. The kids love being at home and I think they really appreciated Grammy just being there to hang out. No presents, no big plans, just quality time.

• Poppy wrote a book! It’s a business oriented memoir called “Jump on the Train,” which is all about his struggles with dyslexia and how that forced him to take risks and think outside the box to find success. He started it during Covid and it just got published this month and I am so proud of him! Even if he keeps calling me every day and asking, “Did you read it yet???”

• Harlow starred in Matilda at school! The show was split up into different scenes per class, so she wasn’t Matilda the whole time, but she did have the song “Quiet” completely to herself. The show was awesome, and she was fantastic, but she kinda lost her voice the day before, so I think she was not quite the powerhouse that she imagined she would be. I still think she did amazing, but I do not have permission to share the video. Her music teacher came up to me afterward and said, “You know Harlow can belt that whole song.” And I said, “I do not, because she refuses to practice at home!” He said I should get her a voice coach, so that’s my next step.

• Mike is currently taking on the very big task of managing our house renovation. Yep, we are finally getting rid of the cat cabinet in the kitchen and redoing our bathrooms, so we don’t fight over who gets to use the outdoor shower. As you know, we have been badly burned during our previous renovation, so he’s much more involved this time. Stay tuned for more on that!

• Leah got engaged! And guess who was given the task to get her to the surprise proposal? Yep, it was me. Cara and I worked overtime to make sure she had no idea what was happening. If you haven’t watched it yet, you must see the video where I tell the whole story. Wedding is in Nashville this summer!

• My “April Fool’s Day in the Life” appears to be going viral on tiktok, 10 days after April Fool’s Day, so people really seem to think I have moved to Florida. If you missed it, here’s the video on Instagram. I promise, I’m not actually going anywhere!

• Also on Tiktok, if you want to support my sponsored stuff, go check out my Day in the Life featuring Smarty Pants vitamins and the tea themed Day in the Life I made for Fresh Black Tea Eye Cream.

• Our special edition March Hare crewneck sweatshirt will be launching next week so keep an eye out!

And lastly, a quick plug for becoming a paying subscriber. This month, in addition to getting access to my *paid only* posts which includes my new series on dyslexia, you also will get an invite to my “close friends” group on Instagram, affectionately called “the Shorties.” They’ve been watching Harlow’s vlogs, already pre-ordered their March Hare sweatshirts and knew about the house renovation for a few weeks now!

Thanks for following as always. Please like and comment so I know you are reading!

xo, Ilana