This is My Version of the Tortured Poet's Department

Guys, I am backed up. No, not like that. With content. Too much life is happening to keep up with documentation of it. (And the way Instagram is acting lately, I’m not even sure anyone cares, but that’s another story.) Mexico might have made it to my Instagram story, but I have yet to post about it on Tiktok. My girls trip to Sarasota has not made it to either yet. I’ve got three Broadway shows with Harlow that I’ve never mentioned, our trip to Legoland (which ended abruptly on stories in the middle), my day at the White House (which I was hoping to turn into a video), the renovation of our house (which I’m honestly scared to post about), Grammy’s visit, a food tour in Chinatown, our trip to Rhode Island for freaking Christmas, and so much more, all taunting me in a to-do list that continually gets longer, because NEW STUFF KEEPS HAPPENING.

I recognize that nobody would know the difference if I let a few events languish in my camera roll for life, but goddamnit, I have a hard time letting stuff go. Especially since I have proof (in the form of my kid’s memories) that the things I post are the moments they remember. Or maybe I have an actual mental disorder where things need to be published to make them real. Is this diagnosable? If a content creator goes to a Bridgerton themed pop-up and doesn’t post about it, did it even happen???

And then soon, it will be summer and the kids will be in camp, except my family will still be wearing winter jackets in my videos and none of them will seem relevant. I think I might have have to freeze time, lock myself in a room and make 30 pieces of old content before I have the freedom to move on. I have never related more to Taylor Swift than when she released that surprise double album, essentially taking care of both Matt Healy and Joe Alwyn in one shot, so that she can start focusing on her Travis era.

Here’s my Tortured Poet’s Department:

• Magnolia floral event, Emily’s studio, March Hare sweatshirt packing party

• Bridgerton event, RH rooftop, Bat Mitzvah

• Mother’s Day- flowers, brunch at Paros, the Fall Guy in 4D, Nobu

• Different places I wore Emily’s sequin shirt (Olivia Rodrigo, birthday dinner, Mother’s day magnolia brunch, Great Gatsby/Shake Shack)

• Travel day to Mexico

• Mexico vacation

• Mexico outfits

• White House day in the life

• Sarasota weekend with girl friends

• Harlow day (golden, chinatown, foot massage, school gala)

• Sweeney Todd

• & Juliet

• Dagne Dover event, Kips Bay showhouse, tapas

• Frieze art fair

• Me + Em shopping experience

• Grammy visit- Museum of Broadway

• Industrie pizza line

• Throwback day in the life to Christmas in NZ

• Jessiclaus Christmas in Rhode Island

I recently contacted a life coach (after learning that an alarming amount of my friends are either seeing a life coach or becoming a life coach) but then when she asked me what I needed help with, I said, I just feel like I never have enough time to get everything done. And she said, okay, well then let’s make an appointment to talk about how you can create more time. And then, for the life of me, I could not nail down a time that I was available. She even offered up Saturday or Sunday morning, but NOPE, we’ve got back to back dance recitals both days at 9:30am. Which will mean, ANOTHER documented happening to add to the list.

And what’s interesting is that I am now following other NYC moms who create daily video content and I cannot figure out how they are doing it. That used to be me! But somehow, big kid stuff is more time consuming. And the platforms keep changing, which creates more work to keep it all up. Don’t get me wrong— I love creating the content! No, I need to create the content! I just can’t do it fast enough to keep up with real life.

So, all this is to say, if you see me posting my February break in the middle of July, treat it like a surprise Matt Healy track right before a Travis love ballad. It’s not just content published for you, it’s for my own healing too.

In other news….

• All the pre-ordered March Hare Sweatshirts have been delivered with the exception of the cream sweatshirts because they printed them with the wrong green color and we are having them reprinted. Hang tight. You can still order a sweatshirt online. They are available in a very limited quantity.

• We are now up to $2835 raised to fund the NYC Casa new parent group, which gives vital information, baby necessities and a support network to 12 new moms and one new dad who are becoming parents at the same time as they are transitioning out of foster care. My goal is to raise $5K, so I am keeping this fundraiser open for a little longer. You can donate as little as $2 to ilana-wiles on venmo if you would like to contribute!

• If you would like to support my sponsored initiatives, I would be forever grateful. Here are a few on Instagram that you may have missed— a mother daughter skincare routine I did with Mazzy for Fresh Beauty, a frank conversation about menopause I filmed for Versalie and a video I made for Invisalign about raising girls with confidence. Not for nothing, but I would love some likes/shares/engagement on that video particularly because we had such a good Invisalign experience with Mazzy and I’m really hoping to work with them again on Harlow’s teeth, which is happening very soon!

And lastly, a word about Instagram. Clearly, they are rejiggering the algorithm which is affecting a lot of creators, myself included. But even though, my stuff is doing super well on tiktok right now, I still see my Instagram audience as my peers, longtime followers, and real community, so I would very much like to land back on my feet there. Do me a favor and seek out my content to let Instagram know that’s what you want to see. I think the younger generations “like” and engage online a lot more freely, while us Gen Xers and millennials are more prone to scroll (our likes are harder won), so I’m trying to be more intentional about engaging with my favorites too.

That’s it! I’ll be back next week with the last installment in my dyslexia series. For the comments under this post, scroll back up to my to-do list and tell me— what’s the one thing on it that you really hope I don’t skip?

I hope everyone had a very happy Mother’s Day last weekend and that you have something fun planned for this weekend too!

xo, Ilana