Simone Biles is Teaching Us a Different Lesson in Bravery

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When the news first broke about Simone Biles pulling out of the all-around team gymnastics final at the Tokyo Olympics, my initial thought was that this was a decision she would regret for the rest of her life. I assumed the pressure got the best of her and she would rather walk away than fail. Even after I began to understand her reasoning (being in the wrong headspace could literally mean death when you are performing moves as complicated as Biles), I felt badly for her because it seemed like a no win scenario. Perform as expected and risk serious injury, plus hurt the US chances of securing a medal. Pull out and get ridiculed by the media and the public, while also tainting what might be her last Olympic experience.

Over the past few days, as the narrative shifted from Biles making a disappointing decision to Biles making a difficult but heroic choice, I realized that my initial reaction was me projecting how I might feel in that scenario. I mean, obviously, I would never be in this scenario because I can barely do a cartwheel let alone a Yurchenko double pike, but I think my own insecurities would prevent me from being able to handle stepping down without shame. Maybe I would make the choice to persevere, thinking it the strong thing to do, when in actuality, it would be sacrificing myself for others. I’d hurt myself (or worse) and then regret it later. Or maybe I would pull out, and never forgive myself for it.

It’s interesting to think of stepping down as being the brave option. It’s even more interesting to think that a younger generation of people have evolved their thinking about expectations, pressure, and mental health. I mean, I’m 46 and still thinking about the time my voice cracked during a chorus solo in the third grade. It’s been wonderful to read all the positive takes about how important Simone Biles’ decision is for the future of gymnastics and elite athletes in general. Of course, there has been tons of negative comments about Simone’s exit coming from the predictable places, but the outlets I trust are treating her decision with reverence. Trusting that as the top athlete in her field, she alone knows what is best for herself and her team. That celebrities and athletes don’t in fact owe anyone anything, least of all their lives.

It’s also interesting to see just a few days later, the direct result of Simone Biles’ actions. Her team took home the silver. She seems nothing but proud of them. Sunisa Lee just won gold in the all-around; so not much was sacrificed for the US Team medal-wise after all. Instead of a story of how Biles stepped down ruining our chances, it is now a story about how putting her team ahead of her own ego was doing what was best for all of them. Because she is the GOAT, Biles knew this from that first falter on the vault and was able to make a thoughtful decision before the rest of us regular people could see it.

At times like this, I wonder about how I would be different if my generation had prioritized mental health and our general well-being early on in our lives, like this younger generation. If we had lived with more confidence, less shame. If we better understood red flags and knew when to say no. If we didn’t stigmatize therapy. If people were more open with their struggles. If we knew that everyone, even the strongest athletes in the world, dealt with things like stress, sadness, doubt and anxiety. If we knew that messing up or backing out was not something we had to carry with us for a lifetime.

I remember seeing Kerri Strug secure the gold in the 1996 Olympics, while hopping on one foot. That Olympics was the summer after I got home from college and I watched every second of it. I remember the Olympic montage they played over and over again, always with Strug in the last clip, her hands held high with pain and pride after that crippling vault, with the music swelling and the Olympics logo fading up. It brought joyful tears to my eyes every time I watched it. I thought she was a hero. The embodiment of the Olympic spirit. Not once did I think about the bad actors in her life who allowed her to take that dangerous chance. Or the fact that she then had to sit out the individuals. And I definitely never considered that her winning vault would be her last.

That heroic moment ended Strug’s career. It was performed not to win the gold medal (apparently, the US gold was already secured without her famous vault, although I don’t think her coaches realized it at the time) but to win the adoration of the country and the praise of a team of people who had mentally, physically and sexually abused her. Today, she reportedly regrets it.

I think Simone Biles will live to say the opposite.

Biles’ decision might have been made due to a mental block preventing her from doing her routines correctly, but it was a decision made with the acuity of a strong mind and sound judgement. Her decision elevated her teammates, taught the world a different kind of lesson in bravery, and elicited an understanding from her fans that made her realize, in her own words, “I’m more than my accomplishments and gymnastics which I never truly believed before.”

Biles is effectively defying the conventional narrative of how one should act in moments of failure. She is showing the world that this isn’t a failure at all. It’s not even close to her defining moment. And every part of her experience is okay.

I’ll be honest. I haven’t been watching nearly as much of the Olympics this year as I did in 1996. I haven’t seen any of the montages with the music swelling in moments of victory and defeat. But I already know what will make me most emotional when I think back to Tokyo 2020.

It is the joy on Simone Biles’ face celebrating the success of her teammates after she stepped back.

What emotions have you gone through watching the US gymnastics team this year so far? Please share your thoughts in the comments!

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